350+ Dark Humor Jokes No Limits For 2024 - Linepoetry

How many emo kids does???????? it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they all sit in the dark and cry.

What did the Titanic say???????? as it sank? I’m nominating all passengers for the Ice Bucket Challenge!

My parents raised me as???????? an only child, which really pissed off my sister.

My grandfather said my???????? generation relies too much on the latest technology. So I unplugged his life support.

What’s red and bad for???????? your teeth? A brick.

Where did Joe go after???????? getting lost on a minefield? Everywhere.

You know you’re not liked???????? when you get handed the camera every time they take a group photo.

The doctor gave me one???????? year to live, so I shot him with my gun. The judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.

I just read that someone???????? in New York gets stabbed every 52 seconds. Poor guy.

When does a joke become???????? a dad joke? When it leaves you and never comes back.

My wife is mad that I have???????? no sense of direction. So I packed up my stuff and right.

Give a man a match????????, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set him on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

Want to know how you???????? make any salad into a caesar salad? Stab it twenty-three times.

Why did the man miss???????? the funeral? He wasn’t a mourning person.

I visited my new friend in his apartment????????. He told me to make myself at home. So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.

What does my dad have???????? in common with Nemo? They both can’t be found.

Even people who are good???????? for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, like when you push them down the stairs.

I don’t have a carbon footprint????????. I just drive everywhere.

Don’t challenge Death???????? to a pillow fight. Unless you’re prepared for the reaper cushions.

The doctor gave me some???????? cream for my skin rash. He said I was a sight for psoriasis.

As I get older, I remember ????????all the people I lost along the way. Maybe my budding career as a tour guide was not the right choice.

Today, I asked my phone???????? “Siri, why am I still single?” and it activated the front camera.

My grief counselor died????????. He was so good, I don’t even care.

I just got my doctor’s???????? test results and I’m really upset about it. Turns out, I’m not gonna be a doctor.